6 Things Dan Maffei Prays Joe Biden Won’t Say at Syracuse Rally (with GIFS)

Vice Presidents aren’t supposed to be newsmakers – but along came Joe Biden and his bad case of foot-in-mouth disease. Now Biden is heading out to Syracuse to campaign for Democrat Congressman Dan Maffei, who is on the verge of losing his seat for the second time. Here are six things that Maffei is praying that Biden will not say at the rally:

1. “I’m hoping to get an invite to Dan Maffei’s beautiful $700,000 house in Old Town Alexandria, right outside of Washington D.C.”

2. “Nobody knows the D.C. game like this guy Dan Maffei – did you know he raised 83% of his money from outside of the 24^th District of New York?!”

3. “I wish I worked for Dan Maffei – when he lost in 2010, he was nice enough to hand out $200,000 worth of bonuses and gifts to his outgoing Congressional staff.”

4. “If you’re like me, you love political attack ads. Well, I guess Dan Maffei is like me because he likes them so much he wants taxpayers to pay for them.”

5. “Dan Maffei really showed he’s willing to take one for the Obama/Biden team – he voted for Obamacare despite the fact that its medical device tax is a job killer in Central New York.”

6. SPOILER ALERT: “I heard Dan Maffei is a big Star Wars fan – well I know he’s been busy relearning the 24^th District so I don’t want to ruin this for him, but I’m hearing that there is a pretty big rumor out there that Luke Skywalker is the bad guy in the next movie.”